Healing from borderline personality syndrome with severe medication dependence

U. K. (47), Waidhofen an der Thaya (Austria)

1. Borderline personality syndrome

I grew up as an overprotected only child trained for success and accomplishment. I had hardly any contact with other children. Except for when I went to school, I almost always only left the house when accompanied by my parents. They kept a strict eye on me. The first thoughts of suicide came when I was 13 or 14. I intended to take an overdose of medication if I ever got a bad grade at school.

Probably out of protest to this pressure to perform, I was very lazy at school and was consequently also very afraid of examinations. At 16 or 17 I would sometimes take tranquillizers to be calmer when doing homework. There were in packets in a cupboard in our living room because my mother worked in a pharmacy. I took 20 tranquillizers at once for the first time when I was 17 because I wasn’t allowed to go out at least once like other teenagers.

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Healing from borderline personality disorder

A. R. (47), Wetzikon (Switzerland)

From my childhood on I suffered from extreme terror, often accompanied by fits of screaming. At the age of 22 I took a trip to Asia, during which a fear of flying and death anxiety arose. The terror panic attacks of my childhood returned as well.

When I was 15 I began to suffer from severe depression. Sometimes I had to stay in bed in a darkened room for days. When I was 38 years old I was diagnosed with breast cancer. The lumps were surgically removed, followed by radiotherapy daily for three months. I coped with this quite well physically, but during this time my depression worsened. Nine months of therapy with a psychologist was unsuccessful. And three years spent in a psychiatric clinic where I was medicated with various medications such as lithium, anti-psychotics (Prazine, Nozinan) benzodiazepine and antidepressants (Fluktrine, Seropram, Tolvon) also brought no success.

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