Healing from drug addiction (mixed consumption)

S. V. (22), Basel (Switzerland)

At about 12 years of age I began to smoke cigarettes. It was during the period when my parents separated. Later I had a friend who smoked hashish every day. At some point I also tried it because I wanted to know how he felt when he smoked it. Soon I was also smoking it daily, and on the weekends I drank alcohol, as well. When I was 15 a girlfriend at a party had Speed. She asked me if I wanted to try it. With Speed, too, I very soon had the feeling that I needed it every day. About two weeks later I took Ecstasy for the first time at a techno-party. Soon I began to consume drugs daily in the morning and during the noon break as well as in the evening. Sometimes I would go for a week without sleep, eating just a little bread. Within a short time I lost over 20 pounds. I was pale and undernourished.

I took everything but heroin

I had moved away from home at the start to avoid unpleasant questions. Drugs and parties had become my whole life and I neglected my friends and family more and more. The drugs gave me something similar to a feeling of happiness. I gradually lost my inhibitions toward drugs and took everything together on the weekends - Speed and Ecstasy along with alcohol - and sometimes also during the week at vocational school. I consumed everything that was ‘in'. I only refrained from taking heroin. Nevertheless, I succeeded in completing the training as a shoe saleswoman. At first I worked in a warehouse. After that I often changed jobs and frequently missed work. I became more and more depressed and was aggressive and moody.

Whether I was sober or on drugs things got worse and worse. In the morning I would just cry. I realized it couldn't go on like that any more. After four years of addiction I spoke with my father for the first time and asked him for help. After that I went to an addiction counseling center and decided to go for outpatient therapy. I went for a session once a week. I was making progress and was able to stop consuming drugs during this period, but would often tremble inwardly and was nervous. My thoughts were always concerned with drugs. I had the feeling that I needed something and wondered where I could get something. However, something or other in me kept keeping me from taking them. When my therapist went on vacation for four weeks I had a relapse. I just had to go to a party. When I asked my friend to leave at 2 a.m. he had obtained some stuff. At home I couldn't resist the stuff any more. After that relapse I didn't want to go to therapy any more and discontinued it. I was consuming fewer drugs than before, but still very regularly again.

Healing while watching the documentary

On November 13, 2005, I went to see the documentary film “The Phenomenon Bruno Gröning” with my father. My father realized that this film was very important for me in the situation I was in at the time. I was always very skeptical when I spoke of Bruno Gröning and could only laugh about it because I didn't believe in God. On the previous day I had consumed drugs for the last time.

When the film began I felt a tingling go through my entire body. The subject of the film moved me deeply and at the end I was very, very lost in thought. Since that day I haven't taken any more drugs. The nervousness and inner trembling haven't appeared like before when I had not taken drugs. What was strange and completely new for me, however, was the fact that I didn't think about drugs any more at all. The thoughts about them were extinguished - they simply weren't there any more. Today I have a joy in life that I had never felt before. Everything has changed for the better.

Psychologist's commentary:

At the age of 15, S.V. began to consume various drugs. Within a short time she was dominated by the drugs. For four years her thoughts, feelings and actions were centered on the consumption and addiction. Although therapy brought a temporary abstinence from the drugs, the desire for them remained and she had a relapse. In November of 2005 she attended a showing of the documentary film on Bruno Gröning and was spontaneously free from any desire for drugs. Her life changed positively in many areas. Today she is still leading a drug-free and contented life. From a psychologist's viewpoint such a spontaneous healing is inexplicable and contrary to clinical experience.
R. B., Psychologist